i took this strange quiz, whhich gave me this really wierd whacked out result.


Do you need a boy/girl friend now?

Apparently I need a girlfreind.

I think not. I am way past that. Seems like for so long I would have so wanted someone to love (in a sense) or be loved in return. As I am a self proclaimed bastard who simply doesn't believe in knowing what love is at 18 years of age.

So i went back to the site, took the quiz again and again and then realised that I should have just answered it the way I wanted too, and then I received this result.



Yes. Right now I don't know what else I can take but a girlfreind is at the bottom of my agenda right now. Hell. I'd get boyfreind before I get a girlfreind.

Good nite all. Marilyn Manson is happy, he can do what he wants without his abs now.

I shall open this blog with a common statement that i make all the time.

Someone please kill me.

I just reached home from Ball room dancing. I also just reached home from spending half a day in school, where I really shouldn't be.

Honestly. I shouldn't have done anything at all today. I should have just slept today away. I am tired.

Nothing bad happened today. And I am not depressed. I really am not. Well, you could say I am. But I am not feeling it. If anyone has the power to grant me a favour. Please get someone to kill me with as little a mess as possible and with as little fallout as there can be. And make it quick. Today in my first chem lecture I was thinking of how a gun put to the head could damage as much primary association areas of the brain as possible and still not kill the person. After some deliberating. I realised i could turn a man into a vegetable with 3 bullets and he'd still retain enough brain capacity to realise what happened to him and be angry that he is suffering without ever being able to do anything about it.

And then I drifted away again. And i was imagining if I had a gun to my head would I be man enough to pull the trigger myself. And i realised that I would be scared but if I ever had a loaded gun to my hand. I so would pull the trigger and kill myself. Coz death that way is almost instantaneous and painless.

I so want out.

I have so many things to do. I just want out. I hate last year. I so hate last year.

Tina Woo has a funny nose.

I had a dream. I walked Cheryl home one day and crashed at her place after school. And it turned out that Kat wasn't home. So cheryl told me to make myself at home, and she went to take a shower. Well, i was looking around the house staring at the various random objects that lie about. And then this strange guy walked into the house. I then said. yes can i help you. And he bolted. I gave chase, but he was nowhere to be found. I immediately locked the door and then all of a sudden. The strange dude came back and was yelling angrily and breaking one of the windows, trying to get in. he had a knife in one hand. And then I realised that cheryl was in the bathroom, and still really helpless either way even if she wasn't in there. I ran to their kitchen , grabbed one of those massive cleavers and a large chef's kinife and held them in opposing sides, the kinda way butterfly knives are held (with one of stabbing one of slicing). And I then I said come get me confidently waiting for the guy to waltz in after he was done breaking the window. I would have killed the fellow had he made it in, no hesitation, I was so dammed calm about that situation. Then when I woke up. And i realised why I should continue with Martial Arts. Coz even if I don't care if I live or die, others probably do. And they would need help with it. I would just no be able to live up to it. If like one of my freinds got mugged in front of me and i couldn't have beaten the absolute crap out of whoever was doing the mugging. And I mean beating whatever bastard to whithin half an inch of death and taking his left ball for a trophy (lol maybe I'll leave the left ball out this.)

Well. Yes.

Bah.

Kill Me.

I have slacked my entire weekend off this ain't good.

I just realised I might be pulling a "Tina". And I really don't know what the heck to do. I hope it isn't what I think it is.

YES I FINISHED DUNGEON SIEGE. YESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It took me 31 hours 59 minutes and 43 seconds to clock the dammed thing. That was from the first load of the beginning of the game to the last save after killing the final boss.

Just as well I bought this old game. Emperor: Battle for Dune. The dune storyline is one of the great epics that the human kind has created. Really interesting story. I used to imagine I was a mentat or Paul Atredies himself. And how I wholeheartedly supported the Ixians in thier fight. Well, I have the computer game of the story now.

Intresting.

Yeah.

Have fun y'all.

I went with Hawon on Friday to this fellowship thingy down at AUT like 7ish o'clock Friday that is why I didn't turn up for Lion dance prac that day. Anyway, that is besides the point.

I realised that even though I said I wanted to be a better christian, It still really isn't in me to really be one yet. As well. I get the whole set of whatever I need to do but i really don't feel like it. And it is not in the sense of the mind is willing but the flesh is weak. The mind is knowing. The flesh isn;t weak. But the third element, the soul just doesn't feel like it. I'd probably go to fellowship again but i really don't feel like it in the sense of really wanting deep down inside to go.

Atheism sounds like an easy path right now.

But what pastor Beto said would apply to so many people there and then. As all words inspired by god would be. Multi edged weapons they are.

The fact that I know so much about God. Means that turning away is damnation.

To be deadly honest. I don't believe in Heaven. And even if I did believe in it to one bit. It doesn't really sound appealing. I'd rather not exist at all. Cept that depending on which School of thought you go to, you could possibly not exist and "die the second death" or go to hell if you don't make it to heaven. I'd not want to go to hell. But still eh. I don't feel very spiritual today. Then again. I really haven't really ever been.

Botany yesterday was cool. Dinner was nice. Peal Milk Tea was cool. The joy ride home was nice. William was cool. Cheryl was nice. Dacing is cool. Lets go play with mice.

Today I found out what the set of letters BDSM meant. Really wasn't nice.

Blogger is extremly unreliable sometimes. If it was a person. I'd take a stick and beat it. Hard.

ARGH BLOGGER DIDN'T PUBLISH MY LAST POST