Man Blogger SUCKS

Well, getting pissed on Vodka ain't fun when you are doing it alone, so I guess I'll leave the vodka for some other time. Or maybe I'll rid myself of that "contraband" and be free from abusive substances. THOUGH the prospect of Obtaining a hard drug is quite interesting. Through my old "contacts" I have found someone who I think is a dealer and he doesn't just deal in small time stuff. The downside. Class A hard drugs cost heaps. WAY outta my income bracket. Class B stuff is much easier and has less kick, but since I ain't a normal dope head. I wouldn't really notice the difference. Class C stuff is not really that expensive in relation to drugs. I think weed and stuff falls under here, crack and estacy too. BUT, I don't feel like getting doped up at all and drugs aren't really my thing. My brain produces enough seratonin naturally. Don't really need to get high for any particular reason.

Nitez

NO luv, NO huggiez, NO girlish crap
Joel.

4

Sk8ing, as Nancy would put it. Was wonderful. Sarah's boyfreind was a cool enough person, a nice guy liked him immediately didn't get his name however, he has the look of a person who is at peace with himself, lucky bugger. Peace is hard to find nowadays. Wish I had some of the peaceful pie.
Nancy looked really angelic and pretty on ice. YES, even with her overtly baggy pants and beanie. Dam, forgot to pull her beanie off right before I left, but that prank would have probably made me a real big enemy out of a good freind, since she claims that her current hair cut sucks so much. So maybe me forgetting to do that might have been quite *looks for a word* good. ( I know my diction choice sucks, so bite me, hard, you know where, NO. NOT THERE). And for reference, I do like her pants I would have liked the pants as much as if William or peter were wearing it, simply coz I like baggy pants, come to my house and look into my closet. 50% of my pants is non baggy, and you never see me wearing them, not even new non baggy pants the only time you see me wear them is when I am out of clean clothes (which is quite normal since if you know me, dirty laundry piles up in my room till, movement is impossible), cept today's jeans which wasn't baggy. I like baggy pants. Ice Skating is beautiful and totally angelic, can see why so many girls, especially someone like Nancy would love it so much. PS: No William, don't push it. I know what you are thinking, NO, whatever you can think up concerning the above paragraph, NO. Tsh tsh tsk tah! NO, not a word I won't have it. The situation is complicated. And if anyone sees Ronald please tell him to stop bugging me and grinning at me whenever he thinks the situation is right for grinning. I had enough of that last year, whenever the name Tina was mentionedI know what you are thinking. No I do not like Nancy. This time I mean it.
Tina, well, nothing much to say about her this time, coz I really thought that she could skate better than what she did today. But still, better than me. She was standing with the group most of the time, like William (lazy ass). Peter loves playing follow the leader, he should gain a wee bit more maturity. But playing follow the leader was fun. Maybe I need more maturity too.
Rainbow, well, I didn't really notice her doing much out of the normal, usual, seen before skating moves.
Hrm I do have muscly arms, never really noticed that.
I so wanted to do one of those beautiful flips, like what we know as a Butterfly kick in Martial arts, or a folha secca in capoeria(a backflip kick), or any of the pure style movements that are never used in sparring, or bloody hell just and normal round off or front flips on ice. I can do most of them smoothly on land, but on ice, landing is a tricky thing and I don't want to seem like a fool jumping fliping and landing and injuring myself. Blazing away on the ice with the cold wind blowing in my face is estacy, if only I could do tricks and stuff. Hrm, and I thought only girls love Ice skating. yeahhhh......
I MUST SIGN UP FOR THE UNI ICE HOCKEY CLUB! Ice hockey would be so fun. It would be like brute force meets grace and finesse. The power and the total agravation of the sport versus the speed and skill required to stay aloft on ice. It is like floating on ice, with a blade in your hand. lol. Blade-on-Ice. NEWAYZ. yeah Roller Hockey was fun. Ice Hockey would be so much cooler. Cept that in the Ice Hockey Arena, Size does matter. Would be really tough, but absolutely fun.

I have always have had this inner conflict. The conflinting two halves of my personality. I talked about them in my blog ages ago. For those of you who can remember the 3 voices.

2 halves of Me:

One half is horny and dying to get laid. It is always thinking up innuendo. Loves to joke about sex. It has huge amounts of zest for life. it is extremly "male" as it swears and farts all the time. Loves Martial arts, fighting is one of the things it lives for. Physical contact and activity turn it on. Doesn't give a shit for most things or people, only personal pleasures and selfish desires.

The other half actually sometimes thinks of sex as really really futile and horribly vulgar and course and actually doesn't look forward to the prospect of getting laid at all or ever. Loves poetry hates fighting/violence, or any other form of conflict be it physical or mental or metaphysical. Loves music and can actually cry if sufficiently moved, as has done before. Cares about everything and actually feels for inanimate objects.

Ooooh that song "There she goes" by "Sixpence none the richer" is on TV now. Must go watch, blog later.

Hrm I missed it. Damm

Anyway. Yeah. I am a person of tremendous self conflict eh. I am wierd bite me, actually don't bite, it causes bodily harm and physical pain from the violence of the move. Instead suck or lick. That way, we can spread the love. :D okay that was not nice. EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. Help me. I need therapy I actually need therapy.

Best Why did the Chicken cross the road website EVER

Well, Man U didn't do amazingly well. In fact they didn't do half well at all. Bloody hell, I want MY COKE. Dam, I was looking forward to boasting. Hey well, could have been worse. We could have lost, especially if Fabian Bartez didn't save that last shot, things could have been different.

When a song is so deeply engrained into one's head it no longer seems fun to hum anymore. It is not funny. Wonderwall has been hummed for the approximately 150th time in 3 days. This is not on.

I have run out of things to say. Will blog later when I am free.

My fingers really hurt I have so overplayed Wonderwall on the guitar. My fingers are so dam raw. Fucking hell. the holidays are so boring. I think for once. I'll write an actual blog on what I really feel and what I did during the day. Maybe this is a change. I hope I never loose my randomness. It is such an intergral part of me. I really don't know what Joel would be without his randomness.

Was fucking pissed in the morning. Nagged on by mum again, about how I don't study enough and about how I go out too often. So I left her nagging and walked right out of the door. Went to martial arts training in the school to watch them finish up training. Taught hsuan abit more of the Wing Chun form. Then walked Kat home with Logan. Then went to Logan's house. Mucked around. Went to my house. Picked up my guitar and walked out of the house, again with my mum nagging at the same time. Then I went with Logan to Murvale reserve. We sat there and I played some tunes on the guitar. Taught Logan how to play abit of the guitar,

THEN

a thought struck me.
I realised that normally guys don't do this. Best freinds chill. but they don't spend time like this together. It would have been a perfect situation for like a couple, not a gay homo couple, coz that is just not right. But I mean for like a gf-bf couple. It would have been such a perfect romantic setting, the golden sunlight, the cool breeze, the guitar, the lying on the grass, the quite harmony of the whole setting. Made me really really wish I had someone to call my own, made me think back to happy times when Joel wasn't Joel the single guy. Then something clicked in me which was really disturbing about how truly gay the whole situation was and how Ryan Bernade walked by just now, and how it may have seemed really dodgy. And I dismissed the whole idea. Then I went home. Got nagged at. Went out for dinner. Now I am here.

And here is:

THE DEAL

Competitors

ARSENAL VS MANCHESTER UNITED

William VS Joel

The Bet

Five Dollars (NZ) and a can of coke

As well as the pride of a man in the team he supports

Who will Win? We don't know.

At 7 a.m. it will make itself apparently clear.

Nite all.

I WANT A NEW GUITAR. I don't want a crappy cheap one. I want something that really makes the sounds. I want a guitar that lends life to music. Wonderwall sounds really shitty on this guitar I have now. I want a new guitar.

I have been listening to Wonderwall by Oasis for probably the tenth time in the last hour this time. If my theory on why we like certain songs is true. I really don't know why i like this one.

Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realised what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now
Backbeat the word is on the street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now
And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
But I don't know how
Because maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me?
And after all
You're my wonderwall
Today was gonna be the day?
But they'll never throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realised what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
About vou now
All the roads that lead you there are winding
Ail the lights that Iight the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
But I don't know how
I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all
You re my wonderwall
I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all
You're my wonderwall
I said maybe
Your gonna be the one that saves me
Your gonna be the one that saves me
Your gonna be the one that saves me


I still really want to find out what was that Oasis song that was overplayed in the 7th form camp was.

I need to stop swearing.

Why does man have to have this stupid emotion known as boredom? Love is whanky enough already. Doofus who put love on the tray was a blind fool. But what takes the cake is boredom. What is the whole point of boredom? It is such a useless feeling. Why can't humankind simply sit and stare at a wall and not feel bored? It would be a useful skill when sitting in a classroom, or when you simply can't be stuffed to do anything.

I am thinking right now.

Few people would dare to do this, but these are the exact things that I am thinking off right now.

1. Sara Lee cheesecake (Mmmmmmm)
2. What is Nancy doing right now?
3. Magnum Sixties Nine - Cherry Guevara edition (Che Guevarra was the man, go argentinian hard core cuban dude sadly, he's dead.)
4. Cookies.
5. Tina and her recent obession with piercings
6. Ker Han and the possibility he has hung himself with the telephone wire, thus my inability to contact him in his possible state of distress.
7. A name in James bond type saying, Hi my name is Hung, Well Hung.
8. Feeling really annoyed at not being able to prgram a decent tune into my mobile phone.
9. How Sony Erricssons suck and how they have horrendous reception in relation to Nokias.
10. Wondering when I'll have my next moccahchino.
11. Wondering how I can get laid and die at the next camp I attend.
12. Seriously wondering why don't I spade anymore and why I dislike spaders so much.
13. Looking at this wierd bug I just killed and thinking about how I violently stamped the life out of this flying insect yesterday and how it really didn't seem to matter that I killed a bug I really don't know why I don't give a shit about living things anymore.

Yeah I am really bored. And I realise i sound extremly pessimistic nowadays. eh who can blame me?

Adeus

Camp was hucked over. We had over 3 hours of tramping to get to the campsite. 3 hours of uphill buggering around. Followed by ages of screwing around. Boring.

I have heard from 3 people that I am an individual with heaps of potential. I can't say they are people on crack since all 3 of them are really nice people, with the exception of one who can be a prick occaisionally and I have witnessed it many times over, but if you don't count the occaissional lapse he would be a reaonably nice person.


Firstly. I honestly don't think I am THAT smart. So, please.

Secondly. Me potential? Puuuhh leeeeezzze, at the rate I am going, all the potential energy I have is the amount which I will posses when I am 10 storeys above ground level (17052 joules). Which will all be converted to kinetic energy (considering friction about 16900+ joules) when I hit the ground at 45 meters a second (m/s) after 4.5 seconds of jumping off.
Terminal velocity which is approximately 75 m/s which will be reached in about 7.65 seconds after I jump, but unfortunately this will not occur since it will take about 286 meters or 29 seconds to reach. but I only have 30 odd meters to fall and 4.5 seconds to relish not having any regrets killing myself. BUT if I jump off a 95 storey bulding, it will be cool, as I will have reached terminal velocity and there won't even be enough of me to fill a jug when they finish scraping me off the pavement. And I just pulled all that shit out of my arse. Amazing. what is even more amazing, I am not taking physics this semester, and even more amazingly, half of that wasn't taught to me in the 6th form, wonder how the hell I knew that.

I really don't see a point in my life. I can't live my dreams not matter how hard I try. Don't tell me that I am not trying hard enough. But if you knew what my dreams are, you'd know I was dommed the momment I was conceived by a fat whanker and my mom. I am doomed to not be able to do what I would have really loved. I shall be doomed to always never cry in public, and look as if all is happy in wonder land. And I am a happy indiviual, when the exteriror hides an interior that cannot comphrehend even where to begin and how to cry, away from the prying eyes of the world.

Thirdly. Me sensitive? So I can tell when someone is not feeling happy, cool. I know how to lift a depressed heart. nice. Anything else? And that is sensitivity? Bah, loosers.

Gilainne, if you are reading this, the truth is that I would be an asshole of a father. And I never want to have kids.

Lastly don't stop saying that I am cool, it feels nice when people say stuff about you. At least that is one thing that I hope I still am, though even that is fading fast.

Joel